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	<title>Comments on: Teacher Forces &#8216;the Only Friend the Five-Year-Old Boy Has Ever Made&#8217; to Denounce him Publicly</title>
	<atom:link href="http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/</link>
	<description>Defending the liberal tradition in history, science, and philosophy.</description>
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		<title>By: TexasAg03</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157428</link>
		<dc:creator>TexasAg03</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 04 Jun 2008 18:47:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157428</guid>
		<description>Confirmed:

http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/may/29/police-report-reveals-teachers-side-incident-which/</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Confirmed:</p>
<p><a href="http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/may/29/police-report-reveals-teachers-side-incident-which/" rel="nofollow">http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/may/29/police-report-reveals-teachers-side-incident-which/</a></p>
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		<title>By: P Mike</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157147</link>
		<dc:creator>P Mike</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 30 May 2008 15:32:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157147</guid>
		<description>I had a 5-year old who was a major behavoral problem from pre-school on, and although he was diagnosed with ADD (possible ADHD) I was mortified at his behavior and held him accountable.Â  I would have been royally P.O&#039;d if one of his teachers acted this way.Â  They all spent a lot of time with us in tryign to figure out how to change the behavor. Â I didn&#039;t/don&#039;t think that a medical condition excuses bad behavior; if the child can&#039;t behave, then he doesn&#039;t belong in the classÂ room.Â  We dealt with it and didn&#039;t exceuse, justify, or otherwise wave it off because he has a medcial condition.

This event did not happen in a vacuum.Â  Conjecture, but if the mother excused the behavor because her son is being diagnosed with Aspergers then she direclty contributed to the circumstances that led to the teacher making a truly bad decision by blocking or making ineffective other acceptable measures.  Before advocating this teacher be strung up, I would like to know how it got to the place where she thought this approach was a good idea.

Once again, I don&#039;t think the teacher is justifed in her specific approach, but lots of institutions use peer pressure to try to correct bad behavor.Â  There is very likely a less traumatic way to do the same thing, i.e., get the other kids to use peer pressure to modify behavior.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I had a 5-year old who was a major behavoral problem from pre-school on, and although he was diagnosed with ADD (possible ADHD) I was mortified at his behavior and held him accountable.Â  I would have been royally P.O&#8217;d if one of his teachers acted this way.Â  They all spent a lot of time with us in tryign to figure out how to change the behavor. Â I didn&#8217;t/don&#8217;t think that a medical condition excuses bad behavior; if the child can&#8217;t behave, then he doesn&#8217;t belong in the classÂ room.Â  We dealt with it and didn&#8217;t exceuse, justify, or otherwise wave it off because he has a medcial condition.</p>
<p>This event did not happen in a vacuum.Â  Conjecture, but if the mother excused the behavor because her son is being diagnosed with Aspergers then she direclty contributed to the circumstances that led to the teacher making a truly bad decision by blocking or making ineffective other acceptable measures.  Before advocating this teacher be strung up, I would like to know how it got to the place where she thought this approach was a good idea.</p>
<p>Once again, I don&#8217;t think the teacher is justifed in her specific approach, but lots of institutions use peer pressure to try to correct bad behavor.Â  There is very likely a less traumatic way to do the same thing, i.e., get the other kids to use peer pressure to modify behavior.</p>
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		<title>By: TexasAg03</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157070</link>
		<dc:creator>TexasAg03</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 May 2008 14:09:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157070</guid>
		<description>&lt;em&gt;I do not find the teacherâ€™s solution acceptable, but I do not think that the child should automatically be allowed to misbehave without consequences whether he has issues or not; there are other kids in the class that I would prefer not be taught actions do not have consequences. Personal problems or not, kids sometimes have to be taught, coerced, forced, or embarrased into acceptable behavior.

&lt;/em&gt;I don&#039;t think anyone is abdicating that children be allowed to misbehave without consequences.Â  I certainly don&#039;t feel that way.Â  However, what the teacher did (or allegedly did) in this case was unacceptable regardless of the mental or physical issues of the child.

I have a five year old who, thank God, has no major medical issues.Â  If a teacher did this to him, I would be outraged beyond belief.Â </description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><em>I do not find the teacherâ€™s solution acceptable, but I do not think that the child should automatically be allowed to misbehave without consequences whether he has issues or not; there are other kids in the class that I would prefer not be taught actions do not have consequences. Personal problems or not, kids sometimes have to be taught, coerced, forced, or embarrased into acceptable behavior.</p>
<p></em>I don&#8217;t think anyone is abdicating that children be allowed to misbehave without consequences.Â  I certainly don&#8217;t feel that way.Â  However, what the teacher did (or allegedly did) in this case was unacceptable regardless of the mental or physical issues of the child.</p>
<p>I have a five year old who, thank God, has no major medical issues.Â  If a teacher did this to him, I would be outraged beyond belief.Â </p>
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		<title>By: P Mike</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157068</link>
		<dc:creator>P Mike</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 May 2008 13:22:45 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157068</guid>
		<description>Lucy,

The boys demeanor during interview and the other kids (alleged) statements about his behavor are at odds with the characterstics (shyness, reserved nature, and following the rules) you&#039;ve provided.

Again, if this kid does not have Aspergers would people react the same?Â  If he is just a behavor problem with which the teacher could not cope and was unable to regin in? 

There has been a piling on and a media blitz without any background or understanding of the situation.Â  If this was the end result of a series of attempts to modify behavior by a teacher unable to otherwise get some modification then it is fundamentally different than a random shot out of left field.  I would not expect the school to legally be able to release information about previous disciplinary actions, but the mother ought to provide a request/consent for release to the public or back down the rhetoric. 

I do not find the teacher&#039;s solution acceptable, but I do not think that the child should automatically be allowed to misbehave without consequences whether he has issues or not; there are other kids in the class that I would prefer not be taught actions do not have consequences. Personal problems or not, kids sometimes have to be taught, coerced, forced, or embarrased into acceptable behavior.  Sometimes it is emotionally painful because sometimes nothing else works in a conflict of wills.  The education system is going to be in real trouble if &quot;intentional infliction of emotional distress&quot; is grounds for legal action (not to mention the advertising industry, military, and a whole lot of other institutions that attempt behavor modification). </description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Lucy,</p>
<p>The boys demeanor during interview and the other kids (alleged) statements about his behavor are at odds with the characterstics (shyness, reserved nature, and following the rules) you&#8217;ve provided.</p>
<p>Again, if this kid does not have Aspergers would people react the same?Â  If he is just a behavor problem with which the teacher could not cope and was unable to regin in? </p>
<p>There has been a piling on and a media blitz without any background or understanding of the situation.Â  If this was the end result of a series of attempts to modify behavior by a teacher unable to otherwise get some modification then it is fundamentally different than a random shot out of left field.  I would not expect the school to legally be able to release information about previous disciplinary actions, but the mother ought to provide a request/consent for release to the public or back down the rhetoric. </p>
<p>I do not find the teacher&#8217;s solution acceptable, but I do not think that the child should automatically be allowed to misbehave without consequences whether he has issues or not; there are other kids in the class that I would prefer not be taught actions do not have consequences. Personal problems or not, kids sometimes have to be taught, coerced, forced, or embarrased into acceptable behavior.  Sometimes it is emotionally painful because sometimes nothing else works in a conflict of wills.  The education system is going to be in real trouble if &#8220;intentional infliction of emotional distress&#8221; is grounds for legal action (not to mention the advertising industry, military, and a whole lot of other institutions that attempt behavor modification). </p>
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		<title>By: Sandi</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157060</link>
		<dc:creator>Sandi</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 May 2008 08:44:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157060</guid>
		<description>&lt;a href=&quot;http://autisticnation.typepad.com/thinking_in_metaphors/2008/05/wendy-portillos.html&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;More reading on this Autisic Advocacy blog&lt;/a&gt; with a reply from Ms Barton (Alex mom) in the comments.

And &lt;a href=&quot;http://jonathanturley.org/2008/05/25/teacher-accused-of-public-humiliation-of-five-year-old-autistic-child/&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Jonathan Turley believes there is a good case&lt;/a&gt; to sue based on not only negligence but an intentional infliction of emotional distress.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://autisticnation.typepad.com/thinking_in_metaphors/2008/05/wendy-portillos.html" rel="nofollow">More reading on this Autisic Advocacy blog</a> with a reply from Ms Barton (Alex mom) in the comments.</p>
<p>And <a href="http://jonathanturley.org/2008/05/25/teacher-accused-of-public-humiliation-of-five-year-old-autistic-child/" rel="nofollow">Jonathan Turley believes there is a good case</a> to sue based on not only negligence but an intentional infliction of emotional distress.</p>
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		<title>By: Lucy</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157048</link>
		<dc:creator>Lucy</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 29 May 2008 00:16:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157048</guid>
		<description>P Mike -- One of the most credible experts on Aspergers is Tony Woodall.Â  

As for &quot;currently being diagnosed&quot;, it might mean that her insurance won&#039;t pay for a brain-scan. Those are wildly expensive, though effective. Most cases are determined through behavior observation over time. 

Part of the problem is that Aspergers covers a wide range of impairment.Â  Significantly, its possible to have &quot;mild&quot; Aspergers and pass for normal. Which is NOT the same as being normal.Â  Its a rather subtle difference. 

For example, kids with Aspergers have a problem telling the difference between someone who is their friend and someone who is friendly.Â  To me, it seems the disorder is based on the inability to recognize undercurrents inÂ short-term verbal situations.Â  

It is my experience, both personally and in research, thatÂ people with Aspergers areÂ often painfully shy in group situations, aware they are missing something. I find it unlikely that Aspergers was the cause of his misbehaving.Â  If anything, I find that children with Aspergers behave better in the classroom because they stick to rules as their social &quot;salvation&quot;, like a road-map through uncharted territory.Â  They also tend to be quieter, to avoid humiliation if they misinterpret a situation. 

School is a wonderful place for children with Aspergers IF the teacher does not take theirÂ  &quot;reserved&quot; natureÂ personally. The school structure, with a good teacher, is a great place for them to observe and interact with other people. HOWEVER, I&#039;ve often seen teachers take it VERY personally if a child doesn&#039;t fawn all over them. 

PutÂ bluntly, children with Aspergers lack the social skills to effectively &quot;kiss ass&quot; to get the teacher to leave them alone.Â Â 

Regardless, what that teacher did (even just what she admitted to doing) is nasty bullying behavior. Wonder what else she&#039;s done? Because someone with judgement THATÂ bad has definitely made some other poor choices ...</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>P Mike &#8212; One of the most credible experts on Aspergers is Tony Woodall.Â  </p>
<p>As for &quot;currently being diagnosed&quot;, it might mean that her insurance won&#8217;t pay for a brain-scan. Those are wildly expensive, though effective. Most cases are determined through behavior observation over time. </p>
<p>Part of the problem is that Aspergers covers a wide range of impairment.Â  Significantly, its possible to have &quot;mild&quot; Aspergers and pass for normal. Which is NOT the same as being normal.Â  Its a rather subtle difference. </p>
<p>For example, kids with Aspergers have a problem telling the difference between someone who is their friend and someone who is friendly.Â  To me, it seems the disorder is based on the inability to recognize undercurrents inÂ short-term verbal situations.Â  </p>
<p>It is my experience, both personally and in research, thatÂ people with Aspergers areÂ often painfully shy in group situations, aware they are missing something. I find it unlikely that Aspergers was the cause of his misbehaving.Â  If anything, I find that children with Aspergers behave better in the classroom because they stick to rules as their social &quot;salvation&quot;, like a road-map through uncharted territory.Â  They also tend to be quieter, to avoid humiliation if they misinterpret a situation. </p>
<p>School is a wonderful place for children with Aspergers IF the teacher does not take theirÂ  &quot;reserved&quot; natureÂ personally. The school structure, with a good teacher, is a great place for them to observe and interact with other people. HOWEVER, I&#8217;ve often seen teachers take it VERY personally if a child doesn&#8217;t fawn all over them. </p>
<p>PutÂ bluntly, children with Aspergers lack the social skills to effectively &quot;kiss ass&quot; to get the teacher to leave them alone.Â Â </p>
<p>Regardless, what that teacher did (even just what she admitted to doing) is nasty bullying behavior. Wonder what else she&#8217;s done? Because someone with judgement THATÂ bad has definitely made some other poor choices &#8230;</p>
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		<title>By: P Mike</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157039</link>
		<dc:creator>P Mike</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 May 2008 21:38:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-157039</guid>
		<description>Kind of semi-random (sorry) --

First, I don&#039;t think what the teacher did is acceptable, period.Â  Second, the fact that she did it (and some of the other kids responses) indicates there were probably behavior problems.Â  The school should have a clear cut policy for dealing with behavior problems (I know my kid&#039;s school does, I&#039;ve had to have it explained to me pretty clearly).Â  If she did not follow policy, she should be held accountable.Â  If for some reaons the actions she took are school policy,....

It gets complicated for children with disabilities (again, personal experience).Â  If this kid did not have Aspergers (and actually the mother says he is currently being diagnosed, whatever that means) would it make a difference?

If the kid does have Aspergers (I just read through Aspergers on Wiki; maybe not a credible source) andÂ  although I don&#039;t know or really understand how to treat the problem, I would thinkÂ mainstreaming a 5-year old before &quot;treatment&quot; would pretty much guarentee a long and difficult series of problems.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Kind of semi-random (sorry) &#8211;</p>
<p>First, I don&#8217;t think what the teacher did is acceptable, period.Â  Second, the fact that she did it (and some of the other kids responses) indicates there were probably behavior problems.Â  The school should have a clear cut policy for dealing with behavior problems (I know my kid&#8217;s school does, I&#8217;ve had to have it explained to me pretty clearly).Â  If she did not follow policy, she should be held accountable.Â  If for some reaons the actions she took are school policy,&#8230;.</p>
<p>It gets complicated for children with disabilities (again, personal experience).Â  If this kid did not have Aspergers (and actually the mother says he is currently being diagnosed, whatever that means) would it make a difference?</p>
<p>If the kid does have Aspergers (I just read through Aspergers on Wiki; maybe not a credible source) andÂ  although I don&#8217;t know or really understand how to treat the problem, I would thinkÂ mainstreaming a 5-year old before &quot;treatment&quot; would pretty much guarentee a long and difficult series of problems.</p>
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		<title>By: jrogge</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-156995</link>
		<dc:creator>jrogge</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 May 2008 16:31:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-156995</guid>
		<description>The story really only has one side reporting. I would like to see a dunce cap treatment of kids that act up in class. Getting discipline back in schools would be a nice thing and probably foster learning. This is a great &quot;dunce cap&quot; tactic and I like it. Too bad it was performed on a special needs kid. That&#039;s the stinger here. 

This teacher should have contacted the parents and tried to place the child in a special needs school such as a school for autistic children. That is the only irresponsibility on her part.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The story really only has one side reporting. I would like to see a dunce cap treatment of kids that act up in class. Getting discipline back in schools would be a nice thing and probably foster learning. This is a great &quot;dunce cap&quot; tactic and I like it. Too bad it was performed on a special needs kid. That&#8217;s the stinger here. </p>
<p>This teacher should have contacted the parents and tried to place the child in a special needs school such as a school for autistic children. That is the only irresponsibility on her part.</p>
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		<title>By: Martin L. Shoemaker</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-156992</link>
		<dc:creator>Martin L. Shoemaker</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 May 2008 16:15:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-156992</guid>
		<description>TexasAg03, that adds a lot of credibility to the story.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>TexasAg03, that adds a lot of credibility to the story.</p>
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		<title>By: TexasAg03</title>
		<link>http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-156989</link>
		<dc:creator>TexasAg03</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 May 2008 16:03:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://deanesmay.com/2008/05/27/teacher-forces-the-only-friend-the-five-year-old-boy-has-ever-made-to-denounce-him-publicly/#comment-156989</guid>
		<description>&lt;a href=&quot;http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/may/27/school-district-reassigns-teacher-after/&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Here&#039;s another article&lt;/a&gt; on this story.Â  This is the key paragraph:

&lt;em&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Barton and Port St. Lucie Police Department officials said &lt;/strong&gt;teacher Wendy Portillo made Alex stand in front of the room while his classmates told him what bothered them about him. Because the class was studying tallies and vote-taking, Portillo then led a class vote as to whether Alex should be allowed to stay in the class.&lt;/em&gt;

The mother of another child in the class has confirmed the story as well. Â  

This sounds so outrageous that no one, including me, wants it to be true, but it sounds like it did happen.Â  If it did, that woman shoud be fired immediately.Â  If it did not happen, the mother, the reporter, and any officials who have confirmed the story should be prosecuted.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.tcpalm.com/news/2008/may/27/school-district-reassigns-teacher-after/" rel="nofollow">Here&#8217;s another article</a> on this story.Â  This is the key paragraph:</p>
<p><em><strong>Barton and Port St. Lucie Police Department officials said </strong>teacher Wendy Portillo made Alex stand in front of the room while his classmates told him what bothered them about him. Because the class was studying tallies and vote-taking, Portillo then led a class vote as to whether Alex should be allowed to stay in the class.</em></p>
<p>The mother of another child in the class has confirmed the story as well. Â  </p>
<p>This sounds so outrageous that no one, including me, wants it to be true, but it sounds like it did happen.Â  If it did, that woman shoud be fired immediately.Â  If it did not happen, the mother, the reporter, and any officials who have confirmed the story should be prosecuted.</p>
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