Aquaman has become the archetype for the truly worthless superhero, but I don’t think this is really fair. How useless can someone really be if he can deadlift multi-story buildings and command the loyalty of all that lives in the sea?
So where did he get the bad rap? The problem is that in his best-known incarnations (the Justice League of America and Superfriends), he’s teamed up with:
- Superman, whose strength (no known limit), speed (can travel back in time by flying faster than the speed of light), and invulnerability (has survived standing right next to a nuke when it went off, with only the inconvenience of having fallout stuck to his skin) transcend the laws of physics to an absurd degree even by the standards of comic-book superheroes. Not to mention x-ray vision, shooting lasers out of his eyes, and dozens of other minor powers that have piled up over the decades, any one of which could be the primary power of a lesser superhero.
- Green Lantern, whose ability to do anything to anything or anyone (provided it isn’t yellow) just by imagining it happening makes him a god in all but name.
- Wonder Woman, who actually is a god (well, a demigoddess inserted into the Greek pantheon).
- And, of course, Batman. Who is the goddamn Batman.
Give Aquaman a show where he’s teamed up with Night Owl, the Tick, and Orgazmo, and we’ll soon see who’s useless.
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I would say Aquaman looks less worthless next to the modern day Superman. In the late 80s (1987?), DC “relaunched” the Superman mythos and de-powered him a bit. His strength has limits, he cannot time travel at will, and other powers have been reduced as well.
Basically, the writers were having trouble coming up with plausible villains for a guy who could throw planets around. However, in recent animated stories (Justice League Unlimited, to be precise), Superman himself stated that he held himself back because he “lived in a cardboard world” and constantly had to worry about breaking things and killing people. He was able to unleash his full fury against Darkseid.
I quit collecting comics years ago (couldn’t afford it any more), but I can say that these changes made the Superman books better, since he could be defeated.
In an episode of “Entourage” on HBO, the lead character got the part in next James Cameron movie, “AquaMan,” which made him and his agent Ari a lotta shekels.
-HB
I don’t know… Orgazmo had his charms…
Then again he was just an iteration of the “Orgasmatron Torture Device.”
Or Section 8 from Hitman.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Section_8_(comics)
Bueno…
Feh.
True hipsters know that Aquaman was succeeded in relevance around the mid 70’s by Aqua VELVA man.
Forgot the link
I blame the “Aquaman is useless” sentiment on Seinfeld. It may have existed before him, but it became “received wisdom” when Seinfeld said it.
Useless? He’s a freakin’ king! He can order Superman around in the ocean, and ol’ law-and-order Supes has to go along. “Get your ass outa my ocean!” “OK, Arthur, whatever you say.”
And he can order around the Atlantean army, arguably the most powerful military on the planet.
And he can survive crushing depths, see in deep ocean darkness, and swim faster than pretty much anything on the planet short of Superman. AND he communicates telepathically with sea life, which is a great source of information and a way to enlist powerful allies.
When I was a kid, I spent much of my summers in the family pool. A superhero who got to swim all day and fight crime? That was my hero!
Pssht. Right. They would all be crushed by the humiliating power of Sarcastro. Anyone paying attention knows that.
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